Life Stages of a Goth – Babybat – The Beginning

Aquamarine is a 26 year old who looks like a Goth, talks like a Goth, has the interests of a Goth, knows an awful lot about all things Gothic and has a room that shouts Goth from all its four corners. She doesn’t call herself a Goth because she is on a journey and won’t label herself as she feels that will place limits where there don’t need to be any.

This blog is about the birth of a Goth and will be part of a series exploring what a journey through one person’s Gothic life is like. Why am I starting in middle? Well, because Aquamarine’s view of herself has changed dramatically from when she was a young teenage Babybat and first developed an interest in living a Gothic lifestyle. In those first years, as an emerging explorer of alternative ways of being other than what was considered ‘normal’, she was adamant that she was a Goth. Her reluctance to label herself now shows her maturity and her acceptance that Gothic elements are a part of her life, not the whole of it.

People come to Gothdom for different reasons. In Aquamarine’s case it was in response to a constant feeling of being an outsider. At school she was like a koi carp in a tank full of goldfish. She never quite fit in and could never quite understand the social rules that teenagers seemed to automatically know. Being a Goth offered her a way to celebrate her difference and stick two fingers up to the society that, in her opinion, rejected her.

The first sign of her new lifestyle came when her wardrobe turned black. As a new Babybat (young Goth up to 21ish), she completely rejected any colour and dressed from head to toe in black all day, every day. Then she found purple and black and stuck to that for a few years. She studiously read everything she could find about Gothic style and experimented with make-up, jewellery and other accessories. She was romantic and lacy Goth one day and punk Goth the next. Her eyes were heavy with the blackest eyeliner one day and not the next and her lips were either black or blue. A lot of the time she looked like she’d gone a week without sleep and someone had smacked her in the mouth.

Aquamarine has always been a pale girl but she bought the whitest make-up she could find and plastered it on until her face was drained of all colour. One day she put her make-up on in the middle of summer without realising that she actually had a bit of a tan. The line around her neck made her more clown than Goth but it wasn’t long before she learned how to apply her make-up properly and started to look dark and mysterious as a good Goth should.

She carried bags in the shape of bats, coffins and skulls and she collected any jewellery and accessories that had even a hint of Gothic imagery or symbolism on them. She found Iron Maiden and My Chemical Romance but she still liked Eminem, 911 and Blue. She was relentless in her hunt for all things Gothic and she devoured movies and books with Gothic themes while also watching Disney cartoons and Malcolm in the Middle. It wasn’t long before she found anime and became an ardent fan.

My point in relating Aquamarine’s story is to highlight that at the beginning, many Babybats, Baby Goths, Gothlings, whatever you want to call them, have a similar tale about why they found Gothdom. Either their rejection of the community around them or a perception of being rejected by that community often makes Gothdom an attractive alternative, a way to opt out of a world they don’t feel a part of. Many new Babybats will explore and experiment with different subcultures and with the different elements of Gothdom until they find their place within it.  Aquamarine’s tendency for overkill in the beginning is quite common.

For some new Babybats, being a ‘Goth’ will end up being a passing phase but for others it will be the first step on a lifelong journey, as it was for Aquamarine.

The reasons people are attracted to Gothdom are myriad. Children’s literature and movies are peppered with the Gothic themes of supernatural beings, dark and scary happenings, good and evil, forlorn love and overwhelming emotion. Puberty is an emotional time so it’s not surprising that Gothdom is attractive to this age group. Harry Potter, the Spiderwick Chronicles, The Addams Family, The Nightmare before Christmas, Batman and Snow White, are all children’s books and films that have Gothic elements.

Aquamarine went on to adopt being ‘Goth’ as part of her overall lifestyle but the way she wears ‘Gothic’ has changed. It is now a part of her but not the whole part of her. The next part of her story will be told in my next blog ‘Life Stages of a Goth – Adult Goths’.

I'd love to hear how you became a Babybat - leave a comment and tell me your story!